101 Things the Fire Department wishes you knew



Monday, September 29

...for the asthma, worsening...


I hate it when my asthma acts up...while in Police custody. A fellow has decided to try to get out of going to jail by claiming his asthma has suddenly worsened.

THE EMERGENCY
A gentleman in Police custody tells officers his asthma is worsening while he has been in the holding cell. But for the full appreciation of this call, let's back track a bit, shall we?

THE EMERGENCY 5 HOURS AGO
A fellow in the Police holding cell claims he is having chest pains and difficulty breathing, prompting the boys in blue to give us a ring. No problem there. When rescuers arrive the fellow decides to berate them with profanity, insults, racial slurs and the threat of bodily fluids to fly in their direction. Being one not to enjoy such things, I decide to approach him and softy explain the situation and offer help while standing just outside of the reach of his feet, as he is handcuffed to a wall. While he explains in detail intimate moments with various members of my family he says the magic words, "I'll kill you if you don't take me out of here!" Threatening us on duty is kind of a big deal and the police take over at that point.
I only mention this event because sitting on the same bench, also handcuffed is the man who will ask for an ambulance in 5 hours time. I look to his frightened face and ask, "You OK pal?" He simply nods with a vacant look that screamed HELP ME!

THE ACTION

BACK TO PRESENT TIME: 2:36 AM
Our disagreeable friend from earlier has been taken away leaving my "Pal" from before. "Oh, it's you," He comments, "When do you get off duty?" I realized there were all new police officers on duty and that he clearly thought he could try a nicer version of what he saw earlier. "I get off duty long after you'll be in jail. Do you have an emergency?" I ask receiving the expected answer, "Never mind."

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