Saturday, December 20

I'm going to punch someone in the face

I will, I've been saying it for almost a year now and I'm finally resolved that in the coming year, the next person to say the phrase, "I gots the Asthma" will get punched in the face. Unprofessional, absolutely. Wrong, you bet. Possibly license ending, likely. But I'm going to feel REALLY good about it. I can't seem to get through to my regulars that the path to wellness begins with quitting smoking, quitting drugs, cutting WAY back on the alcohol and get enough sleep. Then you'll have the energy to learn the English language.
They don't "gots the asthma" because of some government conspiracy or strange chemical in their homes, they need to simply dust a few times a year.
Go into a smoker's home and slightly move a hanging picture? If you can see where the picture used to be you have asthma because your lungs are sick of ingesting crap.
Yet I still smile, offer a free ride to free healthcare and know my problems are tiny in comparison.
But I can't complain really, I guess. Without cigarettes and alcohol I'd be out of a job.

Cracking my knuckles and waiting for a bell,
The Happy Medic


MotorCop said...

Do it. Crack someone right in the face. We can all live vicariously through you. I whole-heartedly support you.

Firecap5 said...

Hit 'em two times! Give em one for the Gipper! Then tell them this, "Get lots of drugs, avoid sleep, and don't do milk." Then look at the blank expression on their face as they try to digest what you said!! Its good for a laugh anyway!