It's a lifestlye choice

If they ever start controlling the distribution of alcohol, we will never to be able to justify a single ambulance on the streets of America. Oh the crap we do for liquor.

THE EMERGENCY

A full ALS assignment has been dispatched to a local motel for a report of "multiple fainting."

THE ACTION

The nonchalant way we were buzzed into the hallway should have been the first sign something was amiss.

We find our patient and the caller in a room labeled a non-smoking although the dozens of half smoked cigarettes on the floor tell us otherwise. The caller states his "friend" has not been answering her phone and knew she was here so called us in case he was unable to get in. Into the motel room. Near the front desk. Where they have keys.

Locksmith 99 responding.

Our patient is intoxicated to a point I rarely see anymore. Some people use paints, others fabric or sculpture, our new friend uses gin.

The bottles lined up against the window represent a years supply for me, maybe 10 months if family is in town. She's been here 1 week and both she and the room are showing it.

Vitals come back just fine and she is indeed altered, much in the way the label on the bottle tells her she will be.

The kicker here is that the family friend states her family pays for the room when she "goes into the blackness of another bender" and that they can often reach her by phone. The caller asks if we can get her "checked out" at the ER. When I asked what her doctor thinks of this activity, after we learned she has quite a bit of money at her disposal, the caller stated "Who are we to judge her lifestyle choice?"

"Um, you called me, so I'm the judge. This isn't an emergency, this is a chronic condition and she needs way more than the ER can handle."

As he's digesting my response a paramedic intern arrives with the day car to continue the assessment. The intern is gagging on the odor of feces, cigarettes and dirty sheets while trying to conduct the assessment. Must be in her first 200 hours. All the while the patient is slowly wavering from side to side as if I'm on the dock and she's on a boat. And she just might be.

Alcohol...it's fantastic!