Conversations with the remarkably intoxicated #9943765

Ever built a house of cards? No?  Well youngun' pull up a chair and learn.  The hardest part is balancing the first 2 cards ever so carefully against one another so neither falls down.  Then you add the third one for stability. Together the three lean against one another. Apart,'s not easy.

The remarkably intoxicated are similar sometimes.

We had 2 friends who apparently started drinking 20 hours ago, then all the way on the plane.  Turns out if you're a VIP on the airline they sometimes stretch that pesky "We don't serve you if you're drunk" rule.

We find them in the baggage claim area, swaying ever so slightly together, like wheat in the breeze.  A passerby is concerned one of them is going to fall over and so are we.  However, like that house of cards starting off, the slightest nudge of one card or another sends them both falling.
Sure enough as soon as we touch the arm of one of them (they're both looking down at the ground trying their best to balance) he leans into the touch and they both topple to the ground.

That third card, the one that can keep the first 2 stable, is their friend on the phone who has been calling and calling, circling and circling trying to pick them up but can't find them anywhere.

Of the 2, one is completely unaware of where he is, where his medications went or why I'm wearing a radio.  The other is more upset that his friend suddenly needs an ambulance, able to correctly guess where he is after reading our patch on our shirts (We allow that kind of research).

We have the friend on speaker phone, she gave up picking them up an hour ago and is willing to turn back around and collect one here and one at the hospital.

About 15 minutes after the one who couldn't roll over is transported the first suddenly sits bolt upright, looks frantically around and stands so quickly it catches us all off guard-


I look at the cop nearest me, "Isn't the other guy's name Reggie?"

He just nods.

We never found Jerry either.